with their lives, if for no other reason than to give their children a brighter future. The avenger doesn't just want to win, she wants you to lose. You are dealing with an ex-spouse who just wants to win. At its worse, the kids literally become pawns in an evil game. You will give him the benefit of the doubt (which in normal cases builds trust) and he exploits. In these cases, the control freak is really very, but manages it by planning everything so that he cannot lose. That is why it is so important to wake up and realize with whom you may be dealing. And what about kidnapping or murder? You may be getting a divorce, but that doesn't mean that you don't have valuable and a life story together. This is a dangerous recipe for abuse that can range from financial manipulation, to parental alienation (from mild to severe to kidnapping or even, rarelymurder. Today, we'll go over the Character Traps (your ex can have more than one) that can set off a Malignant Divorce: Ø, the Victim: This Character Trap is dominated by the certainty and injustice of being wronged.
Since you were married to him for a number of years, you may also be intimidated by the power of his relentless assault to your very legitimacy. This may not be as easy as it appears; after all you were living with him for a number of years and may perceive his behavior as normalor at least tolerable, when it is anything but. Normal people remember the good from the past. It may not be fair, but it's time that you deal with. Ø The Avenger: This character trap is very dangerous and can be a natural extension of the victim, the control freak or the narcissistif taken to an extreme. Forewarned is forearmed; and that is the intelligent approach to a Malignant Divorce.
Ø The Narcissist: This Character Trap carries the same name as the personality disorder. And, need I say it? For the record (and, if it's not obvious intelligent does not mean stupid. More fundamentally, your ex-husband or ex-wife may not be quite the same person he or she was during the. Parents under the of money worries, legal concerns, stories of betrayal, and uncertainty about the future are going to make mistakeseven big mistakes. They also work from a kernel of truth, which makes their claims that much more powerful; this can be conscious and manipulative or more deeply and even, psychotic. The avenger sees revenge as an end in itself.